Finding Comfort in Being Alone

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As a teenager, I was alone much of the time in my bedroom, going on walks alone, staying up past everyone else. Those were my favorite times. But nowadays, I much prefer being with someone. For the last 5 or so years, I was always with someone. Whether it was my mom, or then my husband, or both. Anytime I was alone, I felt so lonely and these past 2 years when my husband was at work, I was at home with my mom. So I wasn’t by myself too often because I worked at home then after, I hung out with my mom unless I had to run errands for some reason while my husband was working.

But a few days ago, my mom left back to the US and I already feel lonely being at home with nobody else to keep me company. I start working again tomorrow after about a week or so off which should help some. I tutor the English language to people from all around the world so I will have plenty of interactions but with any breaks I have, I know I will start feeling the loneliness again.

So, I started thinking of ways that I could be comfortable again being alone and appreciating the time I have. 

• Planning My Day

Having a set schedule can help to fill all the spaces of my day. From morning to bedtime, I want to make sure I don’t have any chance to worry and/or stress and most of all, not feel lonely. I can plan out my work schedule, meal times, activities, and if I want to take a nap or not before my husband gets home. :)

• Preparing Food

When cooking or baking, your focus is all on the task at hand. Especially when you are using a recipe. It’s also a fun activity to start if you don’t cook already. Even just turning on a kettle and preparing your favorite coffee or tea is a good start. Every step it takes to prepare your food or drinks, is time to really focus on and appreciate those moments you have to yourself.

• Watching Movies or Series

The one obvious choice if you are a movie or tv series watcher is find some fun or interesting films to watch or a good series to binge. For me, I have been rewatching a series with my mom before she left so I do feel weird watching it without her but maybe it will also bring me some comfort in doing so. I also have a few series that have been on my watch list for the longest time that I will start soon. When it comes to movies, there are many I want to watch that my husband may not be interested in, haha. So those are good options as well. Whatever you watch, they can be a good distraction for when you are feeling lonely or isolated.

• Starting a New Hobby

If you are like me that has many hobbies but with many you have yet to try, then this is your sign to start! Drawing, painting, diamond painting, crocheting, writing, baking, scrapbooking, and felting are some of the activities I have been doing the past few years with some not as much as others. Soon I will start crocheting more and practice felting. I will find and/or create some new recipes I’ve been meaning to make. I will finish painting everything I started but put off.

• Writing

Like mentioned above, writing has been a hobby of mine since I was in elementary school. I have one too many stories that I started but never continued with, including my plans to create haiku books. Writing can be something to not only pass the time but to let you express yourself. Whether it’s journaling about your day or experiences, creating fictional stories of your own characters, or writing poetry to let out your emotions.

• Reading

Unlike movies or shows, reading a book helps me to forget about everything else in the world and solely on what’s happening on the pages in front of me. Jumping into a fantasy world helps to escape reality and the stresses of daily life as well as the feeling of loneliness. I also prefer to read in the quiet or to the sounds of nature with no other distractions for better focus on the story.

Creating Arts and Crafts

This includes drawing, painting, ceramics, crocheting, felting, and even scrapbooking. Anything to bring out your creative side and have something to pass the time.

Playing Video Games

I play video games most days and not only are they fun, a great distraction from the outside world, but you can also play with other people. I have gotten accustomed to playing with others on Roblox that it helps me more than anything when I am feeling lonely or sad for any reason. You may not know these people but you all have something in common, video games. Whatever your game is, getting your friends and/or family to join as well can help you feel close to them by still doing something together when they are away.

Streaming

This is one many may not think about or may not have the confidence to do but it’s a great option for those that do. I recently started streaming video games and although not many people have tuned it yet, I did have one conversation with someone while playing games. Roblox of course is my first option, haha. But you can also stream about your day, daily life, traveling, food, live art, music, or other topics you’re interested in. People that are interested may join your stream and can help to feel not alone.

So whatever you decide, having something to do that interests you and creating distractions in your life will help combat loneliness and make you feel more comfortable on your own.